Side Order of Life

I promised you, faithful readers, that I would keep you updated on my dad’s health.

The news is not good. He’s got high-grade Alzheimers. She can’t actually make it official yet, but all tests point in that direction.

Truth is, I kinda had a hunch. Mum had the same hunch. But to hear my worst fear for him realized the day before my birthday is…. weird.

I say weird, because it just is. He’s going to be admitted apparently.

I worked my first internship at a retirement home, and I saw the effects of Alzheimers and dementia up close, so I kinda know what’s coming. It’s scary, and I’m wrecked with guilt about the fact that I’m leaving home soon, therefore leaving my mum alone to cope on her own.

Pervs and Pervettes, I kinda need a bit of love right now. And now…

would be a good time for that knight in shining armor to come save me on his black stallion.

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  1. flexibeast

     /  December 6, 2011

    :-(( *offers hugs*

  2. I lost my step-mom and my mom less than a year and a half apart. Both were sick and suffered for a long time. I, unfortunately, completely understand what you’re going through. It’s not easy, and it really makes a difference to have friends to lean on, even if they are cyber friends. I’m here if you need to vent, cry, scream, talk. I’ve done it – twice – and survived. You will too.

  3. Your dad must be fairly young based on your age, no? No matter what age he is though, that is rough. I’ve dealt with this firsthand and even though I was still fairly young, I vividly remember how hard it was on my family. We’re here if you need to talk. Best wishes to your family.

    • He’s only in his mid-fifties. It’s weird, but I can’t remember a time where it wasn’t like this…. Thanks Vincent πŸ™‚

  4. My grandfather died of Alzheimer’s. When he first began exhibiting signs of the illness, no one in the family was familiar with it (this was 1989), and we couldn’t understand his bizarre behavior. It was quite a strain on my grandparents’ marriage, but once he was diagnosed the worry about his strange actions was replaced by worry about his health overall. We all coped with it as best we could, and some days were easier than others. I suspect the same will be true for you.

    That you have to experience this with your dad is upsetting to us, so we can’t imagine how upsetting it must be for you. And that you’ve learned of his condition right before your birthday seems tremendously unfair. We can’t create miracles, although we wish we could. The best we can offer is an ear to listen (well, more accurately an eye to read, whether emails, I.M.s or tweets). We are here for you should you need us.

    -Jackalope and Jillalope

  5. Yummy

     /  December 6, 2011

    So sorry you have this to deal with let alone have it cloud a special day. Guilt is not yours to carry, I’m sure your parents would feel greater guilt if you were not to follow your dreams because of their health. It certainly does not say you love them any the less.

    Hugs and lots of love from me and YSL xxx

    I’m here if you need me online or on the phone.

    • Thanks darling, and to YSL too (I knew he was a good one). Will take you up on the offer of a chat sometime soon πŸ™‚

  6. Dementia of any sort is so difficult to deal with for the family as well as the person who can often have lucid moments amongt the muddled moments. It is incredibly draining to care for someone with Alzheimer’s but you shouldn’t feel guilty about leaving home, your Dad wouldn’t have wanted you to… I don’t know about over there but I’m almost certain the care which can be provided will be amazing. You and your mum need to take regular breaks all together and not feel guilty in orderr to give your besty to your Dad and also get in contact with carer’s support groups to help you to offload and be supported yourselves. I wish you the happiest birthday you can manage and at least now you have a diagnosis you can begin the process of coming to terms with it. Always here for support whenever you need, Maddie xxx

  7. All the hugs in the world to you and yours, my dear. I can’t even begin to understand what this must be like, but I’m sending my love and I’m here if you need an ear. xx


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