Anger Never Dies

I never really held a song lyric close to my heart. Songs a-plenty, right. But just to hear that one word, that one sentence that resonates with you for that moment and a long time afterwards…

It’s called “Anger Never Dies”, by Hooverphonic. The lyric is “anger never dies, it’s part of life, it’s part of you”.

And it’s the bloody truth. I’m a bit of an optimist at my best. I try to make everyone around me happy.

But in my worst and darkest moments, I am filled with anger. I can go off on an incredibly lengthy tangent about what’s angering me today.

And you know what? Fuck it, I am. A mini-tangent, mind. Warning, there’s anger.

I am incredibly angry and upset at the degree of sex education in the world. Teaching abstinence and scaring kids into not living their normal lives is really not the way to go. I want to grab those teachers by the scruff of their necks and yell sense into them. But I know they won’t listen. And I hate that.

I am incredibly angry at myself because I can’t even provide comfort for my friends, let alone for myself. I just feel like providing virtual hugs is not enough. And comforting myself is seemingly impossible, because I have no fucking clue how to other than sticking crisps in my mouth and jerking off. And I hate that even more.

I’m angry because I bloody well know what I’m capable off, but I just don’t know how to achieve that.

I’m angry because I don’t know how to get what I want.

And I’m absolutely furious at every single thing that goes wrong.

Anger never dies indeed. I can feel it all the time, in my bones, in my chest, deep in my heart, and it makes me want to scream my lungs out.

It’s part of me.

But there is one difference. I am no longer the angry young kitten that started this blog. I’m a panther. And I will get you. One day, I swear I will conquer all my demons and have the life I want.

Without anger.

 

Thanks to Shelby Cross who I hope will give me absolution now.

Previous Post
Leave a comment

4 Comments

  1. Absolution? No. Merely a short reprieve.
    I grant it grudgingly, but on merit, because your words resonate with me.
    Good work.
    Now I won’t have to whip you.
    Until next time.

    Reply
  2. You comfort me, regardless of whether I can feel your hug all the way from you to me here down under!! Love you! Dx

    Reply
  3. Anger, as much as it sucks when we’re feeling it, is one of the great motivators. I love your can-do attitude. You WILL get what you want, I have no doubt in my mind.

    Reply

Whisper to me

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: