I Bruise (Too Damn) Easily

So, still in London, still in good spirits. Which comes as a surprise if you consider a) the state of my legs (seriously, if you`re looking for injury-porn, I am akin to Strictly`s Artem Chigvintsev right now) and b) the quite horrific experience of being evacuated.

Imagine the scene. My new friend P invited me to come along with her to Tate Modern. Fair enough. I like art,  and I love Millenium Bridge, so I accepted the invite.

P and I were at the New Documentary forms exhibite when the alarm went off. And it didn`t just stop. No, after a few seconds, we and the hundreds of other visitors were lead to the courtyard outside. Something, although I don`t know what, was amiss.

Alright, I admit. I had much more fun on this occasion than I`m letting you believe. Tate Modern was brilliant. I am besotted with Paul Delveaux`s Sleeping Venus (hanging in the Poetry and Dreams hall on the second floor). It`s one of the sexiest paintings in the entire place. Trust the sex blogger to find a sexy painting, aye? And who (apart from everyone else in the building yesterday) can say they`ve been evacuated out of a museum?

Anyway, more exciting stuff is afoot for tomorrow. I`m heading to the London Fetish Fair. I must confess, I hope to do some promo for this blog, but it will be interesting to indulge in that side of me. So, onwards tomorrow. Meanwhile, decidedly unsexy things have been happening around here.

A coach load of Dutch teens came in at some point. These teens are hell-bent on keeping us (the sane, sensible people. And me.) up and annoyed. Luckily, I`ve bought books in bulk. Although it`s hard to read anything in the tv room when these teens are keen on watching 4Music at full volume. Yes, you are sexy and you know it, now shut the fuck up and give me some peace and quiet and let me do my crossword, okay?

That last bit was made up.

Anyway. LFF tomorrow. Matt Christie (hopefully) on Monday and Erotic Awards on Wednesday. Can I just be frank and say that I really fucking don`t want to go home?

Somebody whisk me off to Fiji? @notCatharine? Jean-Pierre?

Also, it is not possible to cross Millenium Bridge and not pretend you are one of Lord Alan Sugar`s new underlings in The Apprentice. Try it. I dare you not to pretend for one minute that the sheer FORCE of T9m Pellereau`s trolley does not hit you and make you hum the theme song.

Also, I dare any Ashes to Ashes fan not to have a spontaneous geekgasm at walking over the bridge where Alex Drake was shot in episode one. Dare ya.



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  1. Gosh, busy busy lady! quite enjoying these updates of yours 🙂

    LP x
    (Who did indeed *squee!* on Alex Drake’s bridge once)

    • I heard that the Quattro is at BBC Television Centre….. I don’t know, are you perhaps up for a bit of grand theft auto? 😉

      • Um, I don’t drive but I would mind seeing if I *can* drive by crashing my way out of the BBC with you, Thelma and Louise stylee! x

      • Even if we accidentally crash Westfield shopping mall, I will never *ever* regret doing something THAT cool. xx

  2. You are both total geeks!

    Glad you are having a good time. I am going to London for a day soon but I think it’s a few days after you leave. 😦

  3. I would love to stand at that spot in London where Alex Drake was shot.

    The closest I came to that feeling was when I visited Arnhem, Netherlands, and walked over what is now the “Bridge Too Far”. That sort of thing sends shivers up your spine . . .


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