For the past few days, I’ve not been about the words. And this had nothing to do with the drop, but everything with the moment.
You know what I’m talking about. The moment you realize that your story isn’t working the way you think it should work. Unfortunately, for me, this moment has a tendency of not only arriving late to the party, but arriving slightly more drunk than the rest of the guests.
I was working on a submission for an anthology about zombies and sex. Now, I know what springs to mind. I know what you’re all thinking. But I felt kind of invincible. For I… HAD AN IDEA.
And a pretty good one, at that. I worked out my idea, and the words just flew from my mind to my fingers. When that happens, you feel amazing. Like you’re the greatest thing that ever happened to writing and that everyone should be kissing your arse from now on.
Yeah, imagine how you feel the next morning, when, 950 words in, you realize that what you’ve written so far does not work one bit.
It happened. And it wasn’t very pleasant.
I’ve been bigging myself up ever since. For I was going to write this shit and make it neat. Yes, I was, after I finish this and that and that other thing I was going to do.
I’ve nicknamed myself The Procrastination Sensation. Because I keep putting it off. I keep thinking that I’m going to make it worse. And this is ridiculous. I know I’ve got a decent idea going. I just need to know how to bring it on to the page.
How do you keep yourself from procrastinating, I wonder? I know that, during the dark and cold month that is NaNoWriMo, people come up with the craziest stuff. Because apparently, as the time-honored saying goes, “There’s an app for that.”
But can an app or a program or anything in the world apart from yourself keep you from avoiding writing the story you were so enthusiastic about only a few days before?
Now, excuse me. I’ve got my nickname to live up to.