After saying goodbyes, I kept my head down as I walked out of the tube station. The sun had decided to show up, and I felt like toast in my leather jacket. I kept my head down, tipping my hat, pretending to be one of those mysterious detectives you see springing from the brain of a genius like Dashiell Hammett.
I was tired. Every limb in my body stung and I felt like collapsing on my bed and not getting up for at least a couple days. But I needed to snap out of my sudden headspace. It had been a lovely weekend, so why was I feeling like shit again?
My bones felt like they were made of acid. As I wandered around the local library, trying to distract myself from the nagging pains, I daydreamed of nothing more than just sleep and food.
Ole Acid Bones here eventually worked up the strength to walk to her place.
I collapsed on the couch and vegged out like the massive ginger tomcat I really am to two hours of Come Dine With Me. It would not surprise you if I said I had seen this one before…
Eventually, I got up again and heated the leftovers from last night’s impromptu dinner at a Polish place down the road. It tasted like grease, but my god, grease tasted good.
When I finally found the strength to collapse on my bed, I didn’t move for two and a half hours. My body was officially spent and aching. I felt lonely and unhealthy.
I woke up to less pain and more zest for work.
I don’t really know why I feel so unhealthy. Why this pain in my body feels like the strain of four months of adjustment to a new life just exploding. All I know is that I want to feel human.
I’ve debated with myself and with other people on how to do that, and the thing is just to take care of myself. Eat right, move, and stay healthy. Get plenty of rest and get adjusted to life in London.
I am getting used to the entire London thing. Mentally, I’m in a much better place. But physically, I just can’t cope. Is it because the seasons are changing? Is it because the London cold always seems slightly more bitter than anywhere else in the world?
Even as I write, my fingers feel slightly chillier. It can’t really help that the window is wide open and I can hear several animals having a sing song outside.
I know I’m getting slightly dramatic, but I just feel like I’ve given all I can for now, physically. The only thing that’s not failing is my libido, luckily.
Acid Bones is going to get her arse to an MD….